Are Boobs Stupid? A Masters of the Universe Review

by C. Rommial Butler

If the Flash Gordon movie had a baby with the morbid mini-comics that came with the original Masters of the Universe toys, and that kid was raised on the original cartoon, it would grow up to be this most recent film addition to the He-Man lore.

If you don’t know about the mini-comics, there was a series of four that came with the original toys. In these, He-man was largely based on the Conan model—not necessarily a do-gooder but a barbarian wandering a post-apocalyptic landscape.

This film adaptation, though never taking itself too seriously, still manages to give us some of that darkness in which the lore of Eternia is seeded.

But it also gives us a love letter to eighties sci-fi and fantasy films, accentuating the Flash Gordon connection with the unmistakable guitar work of Queen’s Brian May, and throwing in little Easter Egg references to other tropes from the era.

It keeps itself lighthearted like the old cheesy cartoon but still manages to have some genuine character development, which renders the absurdity of the plot irrelevant.

Cartoon fantasy isn’t about tightly knit plots, but rather the internal and external conflicts of the characters, and the expression of a more basic morality that kids can grasp through that medium.

Jared Leto’s Skeletor was good, though there were times I felt his dialogue was drowning in the effects they used on his voice, and that’s a shame, because he delivered some of the old barbs well—though there was no mention of boobs.

(I’m not sure if this is political correctness or that the insult is just outdated. I don’t think anyone other than Oppenheimer’s Skeletor ever used the term “boob” in that time. I know I puzzled over it as a kid: are breasts stupid? I thought they just made some grown men act stupid…)

Idris Elba was perfect for Man-at-Arms, and the rest of the cast was solid. No one here is trying to win an Oscar, but everyone in the film effectively becomes the live action version of the cartoon character they played.

CGI Lockjaw and Beastman were fun, and the action sequences were as good as any that I’ve seen in more serious films.

This film fits perfectly in the niches it seeks to fill:

A fitting homage to the sword and sorcery genre: check.

A comprehensive reference to all things He-Man: check.

A love letter to 1980s sci-fantasy, including an awesome soundtrack: check.

Even where it tries to shoehorn in some of the usual modern psychopablum about feelings and empathy, it does it sparingly, without excoriating masculinity or coming across as preachy or forced.

I’m not saying it’s high cinema or arthouse fare, but it is clever, and, yes, it has the power… to entertain!